A New Definition

As a girl, I had a love-hate relationship with my hair. Everyone always told me, “Your hair is so thick and beautiful!” I hated my hair until about 8th grade, but was confused because according to everyone ‘ooing and ahhing’, I was supposed to love it. “How can you love hair?” I always wondered. Aren't there more important things out there? Once I discovered the beauty of gel, I realized that hair has such an impact on life. Should it? Probably not. But, you can tell who someone is, purely based on their hair. You can look fabulous, but if your hair isn't just right, you won’t feel it. My hair has become such a part of ‘me’. I’m the girl with long, wavy hair. Not the girl that’s kinda tall with blue eyes. My hair has become a defining statement.

But, yesterday, this all went down the drain for me. My hair suddenly meant nothing. When you get a text from your mom informing you that your grandmother’s hair is falling out due to chemo, suddenly it seems so selfish to love your own hair. Suddenly, I don’t want to be known as the girl with the long, wavy hair. I want to be the girl that cuts it all off. I want to give it to Nana, so she feel some normalcy through such a roller coaster time. When you watch someone you love go through something so terrible, suddenly you find yourself willing to make sacrifices that originally had been unfathomable. I find myself thinking, “If I can do ANYTHING to make her happier and feel better, I will do it…"

Gordon B. Hinckley said, "You will come to know that what appears today to be a sacrifice will prove instead to be the greatest investment that you will ever make".

Cherish the ones you hold dear. Think of ways to lighten their loads and ease their burdens. Even if it means sacrificing today, tomorrow it will prove to be a wonderful investment. 

When Life Hands you Lemons...

I’m just another face in the crowd, another heavy heart, another girl just trying to make it. On the outside, I appear to be okay. But, like a swimming duck, I am calm above the surface, and underneath, I am padding like crazy, trying to keep my head above water. 

When I was growing up, I never understood the saying “when life gives you lemons…” My mom’s maiden name is Lemon, so I always just pictured my aunts crowding around me, and this always made me happy. "Heck ya! I would LOVE to be handed lemons!"

As I got older, I realized the statement was about staying positive, and coping with the stresses life throws your way. It seems sometimes that when it rains, it pours. But, that is part of life, and you always have to be ready with an umbrella. Not a dark, dreary umbrella, but a bright, happy one that is going to cheer you up, and give people around you something fun to look at.

I’m not saying I’m a peppy, overly smiling person, by any means. But, I have learned how to take a nasty situation and turn it into a brighter, less-gloomy one. I have turned something sour into something sweet. 

"In all living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured" (President Hinckley).

Whenever my grandma, Nana, was diagnosed with cancer, I knew there were two ways to react to this. I could cry, mope, and feel sorry for myself, or I could get busy and try and make the best of it. I have chosen the latter, as I have learned from the countless examples of my parents' reactions to adversity. I got busy, thinking of ways that could not only help my grandma, but also those around me, to cope with the news. My mom called me one day and suggested I create a blog for solace and comfort, and while the task seems rather daunting, here I am. I still haven’t perfected my idea of what to do or say, but I hope this blog can bring a glimmer of hope and happiness to a world filled with so many thunderstorms. I am hoping to record memories to honor her life, and through making my struggle public, I hope I can help others while helping me, too. I want as many colors on my umbrella as possible, and through this blog, I am painting it as bright as can be. When it rains, I will be prepared.